


Delayed Reactions

by der_tanzer



Series: Protective Custody [19]
Category: Riptide (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-12
Updated: 2010-07-12
Packaged: 2017-10-10 12:43:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/99858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/der_tanzer/pseuds/der_tanzer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Nick is late returning from Reserve duty, his friends fear the worst.  But nothing can prepare them for the adventure they'll face when he comes home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Delayed Reactions

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hardboiledbaby](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hardboiledbaby/gifts).



> A really late birthday gift for the lovely hardboiledbaby, featuring, to the best of my abilities, everything she wanted.  
> With special thanks to my darling Herr, who helped with the military bits.

"Cody, I'm sure everything's fine," Murray said quietly, watching his friend push bits of chicken around his plate.

"It's not fine. He was due back this morning, Boz. He's never late, he's never missed his plane before, and now we've got that General Whatthefuckever telling us it's classified? What the hell is that?" Cody was nearly yelling and Murray tried hard not to tell him not to worry.

"It's General Winchester, and why would the Army lie to us? If Nick was in trouble they'd tell us, right?"

"Oh sure, right. Unless it was _classified_." He shoved his plate away, hard enough that it struck Murray's glass of milk and knocked it over. "Shit, I'm sorry. Let me—"

"No, I've got it," Murray said, standing up and reaching for the paper towels over the sink. He mopped up the milk and put Cody's plate on the counter where it could no longer serve as a puck. "I know you're worried. I am, too, I guess. But I've worked on classified projects before—almost the whole time I was in the Army, in fact—and it doesn't mean that anybody's hurt or in trouble."

"Yeah, I know that. But you were in Special Weapons Development, Boz. Nick is a chopper pilot in the National Guard. What could he possibly be involved in that would extend his duty?" _And why didn't he call?_ were the unspoken but obvious next words.

Nick had called every day, as he always did when he was away for his two weeks at camp, but he hadn't called today. Or yesterday, either. When he didn't show up this afternoon, Murray had called the airline and learned that Nick had cancelled his ticket. Not missed his flight, but actually called the night before and cancelled. He hadn't set a new date, either. That was when Cody called the base, only to be stonewalled by everyone from Corporal Knot all the way up to General Winchester, the walls getting thicker and scarier the higher they went.

"I don't know," Murray sighed, his tone both tired and apprehensive. "I could try accessing the base computers, but the security is going to be tight and you know what the penalties are if I get caught. It's not just hacking at that level, it's espionage. Maybe even treason."

"Yeah, let's make that plan C."

"Great. What are A and B?"

"I don't know. Is there anyone we can call? Do we have any friends up high enough to get information?"

"You'd know better than I would. What about General Johnson?"

"Jeez, of course," Cody groaned, slumping down in his seat. "If I'd thought of that sooner, I could have called him today."

"I'm sorry," Murray said, as if it was his fault that Nick hadn't come home.

"No, it's okay. I'll just remember to do that first thing in the morning." He dragged his hands through his hair and sat up straighter, gearing himself up to be strong for his friend. "So what are your plans for the rest of the evening? Are you going over to Ted's?"

"No, he—he had to work late," Murray lied. "You want to watch a movie? _All About Eve_ is on at eight."

"I don't know. I was thinking I might go for a walk. Try to work out some of this tension."

Murray didn't think that was a good idea, but he couldn't come right out and say so. It wasn't his place to tell Cody that he was in no frame of mind to be out walking around by himself.

"Don't you think you should stay here?" he asked instead. "In case Nick calls? You wouldn't want to miss him."

"Good point. Okay, Bette Davis it is. You want help with the dishes?"

"No, I've got it. You go sit by the phone." He was smiling just a little and Cody couldn't help smiling back, although he felt guilty for it. As if he had no right to smile when Nick was (_missing_) not there.

Murray washed the dishes quickly and went up to the salon to watch TV with his friend. When _All About Eve_ was over, they watched reruns of _M*A*S*H_ and _Welcome Back, Kotter_ on the local affiliate, not noticing when the moon rose over the harbor, or when it set.

***

When the sun rose, they were both asleep on the bench seat, Cody sitting up with a crick in his neck and Murray lying forward with his arms folded on the table. Cody was just beginning to stir when the sound of feet on deck woke him. He shook Murray, who leapt awake, fumbling with his glasses, and they were both stumbling for the door when Nick walked in.

"Where the hell have you been?" Cody demanded while Murray asked if he was all right.

"I'm fine," Nick said, choosing not to answer the first question. "You two look awful, though. What did you do, sleep in your clothes?"

"As a matter of fact, we did," Cody snapped. "We were sitting up all night waiting for you to call. Damn it, Nick, didn't you know I'd be worried?"

"I did, and I'm sorry, man. Really. But it got complicated." He dropped his duffle on the floor and took off his uniform hat.

"What's so complicated that you couldn't pick up a phone?"

"Well, for starters, my commanding officer told me I couldn't. I had to stay an extra day, I didn't have a choice, and when they put me on the plane, it was so sudden I didn't have time to call. Come on, Cody. I've been gone two weeks, I was up all night—do we have to fight now?"

"No," he said, rather grudgingly. "I was just—you know, I was worried about you." Cody never said so, but he hated it when Nick pulled his two week duty, not just because he was gone, but because he was gone playing war. It gave Cody nightmares that bordered on flashbacks, though he tried not to burden his friends with that knowledge.

"I know, babe. I knew you would be, and I wanted to call, I really did. It's just—you know how the military is. I was just a cog in the machine." He watched Cody's face carefully as he spoke, and stepped in for a hug the second the walls came down. Cody clung to him desperately for a moment, then released him quickly in a vain attempt to regain his composure. Nick pretended not to see how upset he was and covered for him by hugging Murray. "You sat up, too, didn't you? What next? Am I going to find Quinlan in the shower?"

"He was working late," Murray said, hugging him hard. Then he whispered, "I didn't want Cody to be alone."

"Thanks. I knew you two would take care of each other," Nick whispered back. He laughed when Murray blushed, then released him and picked up his duffle. Aloud, he said, "I'm going to grab a shower. Any chance of breakfast?"

"I'll put something on," Murray said, more a response to Cody's expression than Nick's words. Cody wanted to join him in the shower.

"So are you going to tell me what the big military panty-twist was all about?" Cody asked as they went down to their cabin.

"Sorry, babe. Top secret. But I'm sure I'll be able to tell you about it soon," he said as he unbuttoned his jacket.

"How did you get mixed up in anything _top secret_?"

"I can't talk about it, Cody. And I don't want to. There are way more interesting things to do with our mouths than talk about the Guard. Don't you think?"

It turned out Cody agreed.

***

Over the next few days, Murray and Cody combined logic with gentle nagging in an attempt to get the story, but nothing worked. Nick refused to talk about it, but firmly and politely, which only worried them more. He should have gotten angry and yelled at them to give it up already, but instead he just shook his head and changed the subject. It was the first time Nick had ever kept a secret from them, and he didn't even seem to be troubled by it. He didn't tell them about his nightmares, or let them know he was afraid.

After a week had passed, Murray was determined to put it out of his mind, and Cody was too frustrated to face that calm headshaking any longer. They resigned themselves to never knowing why Nick had come home late, and when he took phone calls in private, whispering behind closed doors and saying afterward that it was his aunt, they pretended to believe him.

"What do you guys want to do tonight?" Cody asked as they unpacked groceries. "Boz, are you going out?"

"Yeah, Ted's captain is retiring and they're having that barbecue. I know a bunch of the guys, so I said I'd go. I'll call if I'm going to be home late, though, okay?"

"Sure. Nick, are you up for something? A burger at _Straightaway's_, maybe?"

"No, I'm kind of tired. I was thinking that since we went out and bought all this food, we should stay in and have a pizza. Maybe rent a movie."

"Yeah, something with car chases and explosions, since Murray won't be here," Cody said with a wink at his skinny friend.

"Hey, I like car chases," Murray said, trying hard not to sound too offended.

"You like Bette Davis," he laughed, and Murray blushed.

"I can like both, can't I? I'm a modern guy."

"Yeah, you're a real renaissance man," Nick said kindly. "Actually, you're one of the most modern guys I know. Wardrobe aside, that is."

"Thanks," he muttered, still blushing. "Do you guys need any more help? Because I should be getting ready. Ted's picking me up pretty soon."

"You go ahead," Cody told him, feeling a little bad about the Bette Davis remark. The truth was, he liked her, too.

***

Murray said goodbye and left the boat a little after five. Cody lost at odd/even and went to pick up the pizza and a copy of _Lethal Weapon_ a half hour later. Neither of them were thinking about Nick's mysterious behavior, and Nick wasn't worried about anything right then, either. He felt like he had a pretty tight bead on the situation and wasn't expecting any trouble, although he couldn't tell his friends that. Even telling them that there was nothing to worry about would lead to questions about why there might have been. And it was way too early to be answering questions.

He got a beer from the galley and took it back up to the salon. He was reading _The Deer Hunter_, a book that always made him feel marginally better about his own experiences in the war, and would probably have time to finish it before Cody got back with the pizza. He almost certainly would have, too, if someone else hadn't gotten there first.

***

"Hey, Nick, little help here," Cody called, fumbling with the salon door. He held the pizza box in one hand, the bottom of it too hot against his palm, and in the other, the one trying to open the door, a bag of tapes from the video store. As he struggled with it, the door burst open and knocked him backward. He dropped the bag and juggled the pizza for long seconds before it, too, hit the deck. Cody started to yell at Nick for his carelessness, but that was pure reflex. By the time he really saw what was happening, the two men who had thrown the door open were scrambling over the rail and disappearing up the gangway. His first instinct was to go after them, and then he thought of Nick. Whatever those guys came for, Nick hadn't stopped them. Cody forgot everything else and ran inside.

There he found his partner, his best friend and the love of his life, lying face down on the floor, his hands tied behind him with bright red wire. Cody recognized it dimly as stuff that Murray bought by the spool for his electrical projects. But it didn't matter now where it came from, and Cody shelved that thought as he went to his knees beside his friend.

"Nick, baby, can you hear me?" he whispered, touching the downed man with trembling hands. "Nick, wake up. Wake up, baby." His frightened pleas were met with a low moan, and for a split second, Cody nearly fainted with relief. Then the adrenaline hit and he was digging in his pocket for a knife. "Hang on, let me get this. Don't try to move."

Nick moaned again as Cody sliced through the wire, and as soon as his hands were free, he was trying to push himself up. Cody stopped him with gentle hands on his shoulders and then turned Nick's body into his lap, into his arms.

"Easy, buddy," he whispered. "I've got you. Take it easy."

"Cody? 's that you?" Nick mumbled through split and swollen lips. His eyes were swelling and Cody knew he'd have a nasty pair of shiners in a couple hours.

"Yeah, it's me. Are you okay? Should I call an ambulance?"

"No. No, man, just help me up."

"In a second. How's your head? Did you whack it on anything?"

"No, they just hit me a couple times. I'm okay now, man, just help me up."

Cody sat him upright first, supporting him for a moment until Nick's head stopped spinning, then stood and pulled him to his feet with both hands. Nick staggered a little and stepped up close, resting his weight on Cody's chest. They walked slowly to the bench, where Nick had been when Cody left him, and sat down together.

"Who were those guys, Nick? What happened?"

"I—I don't know," he said, and Cody knew immediately that he was lying.

"Which part? Who they are, or what happened?"

"They just busted in here and started beating on me," Nick said. "They got me down on the floor and one of 'em tied my hands. They were just starting to pick me up when you showed up and spooked 'em. They let me go and ran."

"And you don't know why?"

"Cody, man…"

"It's that Guard thing, isn't it?" he asked abruptly. "Something to do with that big secret you're keeping."

"Cody…"

"I'm calling the police. These guys come onto my boat and beat you up—they were trying to fucking _kidnap_ you—and you won't tell me why. Well, fine. That's just fine. But you're going to tell someone." He got up, jerking his arm out of Nick's weak, grasping hand, and picked up the phone.

"Cody, I wish you wouldn't get involved."

"And I wish this had never gotten started. But it did, and if you won't let me help, then someone else is going to."

***

Even the on-duty cops were over at Captain Lang's, drinking Coke or Kool-Aid instead of beer, and the dispatcher knew enough to call his home for officers. News spread rapidly through the crowd and someone told Murray right away that there was trouble at home. Had his situation been even a little bit different, they probably would have kept it from him. But Quinlan was going to be running the case and he could handle Murray, if it turned out to be necessary. Not to mention the fact that not telling Murray could get someone in Quinlan's bad books, and no one wanted to end up there.

A marked cruiser led the way with lights and sirens and it was all Ted could do not to pull ahead and try to outrun them. It wasn't until that moment, the moment he heard that his friends' home had been broken into and one of them badly beaten, that he realized how much he cared about them. How important they had become in his life. A few months ago, he would just have been worried for Murray, how Murray would be affected by what had happened, but now he was feeling it for himself. His fear for the guys was Murray's, but it was his own, too.

"What did they tell you?" Murray asked, drumming his fingers on his knees and pressing his right foot to the floorboards as if he controlled the accelerator himself.

"Not much. Just a break-in and a beating, and they don't want an ambulance."

"Who said that?"

"Whichever one called. Can't be too bad then, right?"

"No, I guess not," Murray said quietly and went on drumming his fingers, wishing he'd never left his friends tonight.

"Anything you want to tell me, kid?"

"I don't know. Nick's been acting weird lately. Remember how he didn't come home on time last week? Ever since then, he's been getting secret phone calls and going out by himself and not telling us why. I didn't mention it before because he was so determined to keep it a secret, but something big is going on. It's scaring us, and if this isn't part of it, I'll eat my nineteen inch monitor."

"Shit. If the government's involved, we may never get the whole story."

"Yeah." He nodded and drummed his fingers as the quiet streets blurred past.

***

The boat was a crime scene of unknown scope and Ted made Murray wait on the pier while he went aboard with the uniformed cops. Murray paced for a few minutes, offering grateful smiles and puzzled shrugs to the neighbors who came to ask if everything was okay, but not saying anything. He didn't know if things were okay or not, and he had no idea what he was allowed to say.

"Hey, Bozinsky," Ted called from the deck. "Come up here and answer some questions for us, would you?"

Murray had nothing to add and he knew it. It was just Ted's way of sparing him the crowd. He climbed the stairs and let Ted help him over the rail, subtly holding onto the strong arm as they went inside.

"Oh, Nick," he said before he could stop himself, and clapped his hand over his mouth to keep from saying more.

"It's okay, Boz. It's not as bad as it looks," Cody volunteered.

"I'll get some ice. You don't really need me, right?" he asked Ted, who nodded confirmation. Murray went down to the galley to make an ice pack, moving quietly so he could hear what was said.

"Did you know the men who attacked you?" Quinlan asked.

"No. I don't know who they were or why they were here," Nick said with more patience than Ted was willing to credit.

"And you don't know why they wanted to tie you up and take you along?"

"No." He held his hands out so the officer could photograph the marks on his wrists, and if they trembled, it could be chalked up to the shock.

"Look, Ryder, I know you're lying to me. I've known you too long. Why don't you just tell us the truth now?"

"I am. Seriously, Quinlan, I got nothing. Why don't you dust for prints or something?"

"Were they wearing gloves?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, so that's a waste of time. Can you describe them?"

"They were wearing masks," he said promptly and Cody looked up in alarm. Ted glanced at Cody, making note of his expression, and asked Nick if he was sure. "That they were wearing masks? Yeah, I'm sure. I'm not blind."

But when Ted looked at Cody again, the blond shook his head. He'd seen them, too, and while he didn't get a good enough look to describe them, he knew there were no masks.

"I don't know what's going on here, Nick, but I'm trying to help. Are you going to cooperate or not?"

"I'm doing my best," Nick said, and his friends could tell that that part wasn't a lie, at least.

Quinlan sighed, running his hand over his forehead and through what was left of his hair.

"All right, here's what we're gonna do. Rumley, Michaels, get on back to the station and file your reports. Send that film to the lab, for whatever it's worth, and keep this as quiet as you can. I don't want to see it in the paper tomorrow, and if I do, there better not be any _inside sources_ quoted. Understand?"

"Yes sir," Rumley said, a little disappointed that they couldn't go back to the barbecue and discuss this with the rest of the force. He and Michaels shook hands all around, made vague promises that they could not possibly keep, and showed themselves out. Quinlan stayed behind.

When he heard the door close, Murray came upstairs with the ice. He sat down on the bench beside Nick and tentatively placed it against his eye. Nick winced and took the towel wrapped ice pack from him. There was a brief silence while this pantomime played out, and then Cody spoke.

"Nick, what the hell is going on here? It was one thing when you were just lying to me and Murray, but now you're being attacked by strangers—_unmasked_—strangers, and lying to the cops. This is getting serious, buddy. You have to let us help."

"Unmasked, huh?" Ted repeated. Cody nodded and Nick glared daggers at both of them with his one uncovered eye. "Ryder, you gotta start leveling with me or you're gonna get killed and we won't even know why."

"There's nothing you can do," Nick sighed.

"Nothing, huh? You know, somehow I doubt that. Murray, why don't you and Cody go get another pizza? That thing out on the deck ain't gonna be fit to eat."

"I don't know," Cody said, not taking his eyes off his lover.

"Well, I do. Take your gun and keep your eyes peeled, but I get the feeling you don't have to worry. Do they, Nick?"

"No, probably not."

"Nick, those guys were watching us," Murray said. "They had to be. They came right for you the minute we were both gone. We don't have schedules or patterns of behavior—they have to have been watching all the time."

"Yeah, Murray, I figured that out."

"It's okay," Quinlan said. "I'll be here. They won't get the drop on us." No one answered and he rolled his eyes. "I'll even clean up that pizza mess on the deck. Happy, Allen?"

"He's right," Murray said slowly. "They'll be okay, and if Ted can do anything to help, we should let him."

Cody snorted disdainfully. "You sure have a lot of faith in a guy who—"

"Shut up," Nick said loudly. There was no possible good way to finish that sentence, and besides, he thought Quinlan might be right. "You two go get the pizza. We'll be fine. Just be on your toes, okay? These guys—they don't want you. But they might use you to get to me."

"So you know who they are after all," Cody said accusingly.

"Go get the pizza, man. I'm starving."

"Nick…"

"Cody, if you don't go now, you won't be home before dark," he said, and that was the final word. They had to get home to him before dark. Murray got his jacket, Cody found his keys, and they said goodbye as quickly as they could bear.

"Okay, now that the children are gone," Quinlan said, "tell me what the hell is going on."

"I saw something I shouldn't have seen when I was on the base, and I guess the wrong people saw me see it."

"You stumble into some big military secret down there? Find out how the government's planning on wrapping up this Cold War situation?"

"No. I found out that the colonel running the base is stealing surface to air Stinger missiles and selling them to God knows who. I don't know if it's just theft, if he's selling them under the table to our friends, or if he's selling them to our enemies and it's actually treason."

"Jesus. Colonel Thompson is doing this?"

"You know him?"

"I do my summer camp the same place you do. So, he knows you know and now he's trying to shut you up?"

"Seems that way. I did some preliminary interviews with General Winchester; that was what held me up getting back. But there's going to be a formal investigation starting next week, and there's a chance these guys could derail the whole thing by making me disappear. They didn't want to kill me because that might be a clue, you see?"

"I see. So why are you still here? Why not take off for a while? Go fishing or hiking or something?"

"I wasn't supposed to do anything suspicious or out of the ordinary. But I guess that's out the window."

"I guess so. Maybe you'd better go now."

"Still can't, though. I need to be where the good guys can find me when the investigation gets underway."

"And you can't let the general know you're taking off?"

"Yeah, like you could tell us where you were taking Murray to wait for his trial."

"I get it. No point in hiding when word can get out that easy. So what's the Guard doing to protect you?"

"Nothing that I know of. I guess I need to get in touch with the general and see if they can do anything, now that the secret's out. But I still don't want Cody and Murray to know. I wasn't supposed to say anything to anyone, and Murray, especially, has a hard time keeping secrets. He might not be able to act like he doesn't know."

"Yeah. Okay, here's what we're gonna do, then. I'm gonna stay here tonight and have black and whites do drive-bys a couple times an hour. We know these guys are watching—I don't think they've decided to just go away—so if we don't keep to a schedule, that'll make it harder for them to try again."

Nick seemed to think that over for a minute, torn between needing to protect his friends and not wanting to admit that he couldn't do it on his own. It was okay for Quinlan to protect Murray. Murray belonged to him as much as he did to Nick. But Cody? Nick was supposed to be able to take care of him. They were supposed to take care of each other. And instead, Cody had come home to find him tied up on the floor. They could have killed Cody, too, he realized. It would have been easy to take them both. In fact, it would have been better that way. Then the police would think it had something to do with a case, or a random break-in, because Cody had nothing to do with the Guard.

"What if they sink the boat?" he asked suddenly.

"Water's not deep enough here. We'd get off all right."

Nick laughed, loud and long, as if Quinlan had said something genuinely funny. He switched the icepack to his other eye, still snorting but suddenly feeling better.

"Yeah, okay. You want a beer?"

"Better not. Seems like I'm back on duty. Want me to get you one?"

"I think I need it."

Quinlan went down to the galley and poked around in the fridge, coming up with two beers and two cans of Mountain Dew. He heard the door open up above and then Murray was on the stairs, looking around wildly.

"What's wrong, kid?" he asked, tossing him a can of soda. Murray fumbled but managed not to drop it. They'd been working on that, like a father playing catch with his son in preparation for Little League, and Murray had made a lot of progress.

"Nothing, I just—I thought you were gone."

"Not going anywhere for a while," he said, pausing on the stairs to kiss Murray's cheek.

"Oh, good. There's pizza."

They went up to the salon where Nick was still holding ice on his face while Cody tried not to smother him with concern. Ted gave them each a beer and pulled out a chair for Murray. After that it turned into a normal dinner, except that Nick and Cody limited themselves to a single beer each, so they would be alert if they had to wake up during the night. And still Nick refused to talk about what had happened. Cody had expected to come home and find that Quinlan had convinced him to explain it, or was at least willing to repeat what had been said, but neither of them acknowledged that they had discussed it at all. The unity of silence unnerved him when he wasn't a part of it.

After they ate, Cody said goodnight and helped Nick down to their cabin, still thinking he would get the story.

"Did Quinlan have anything useful for you?" he asked, kneeling to untie Nick's shoes. Nothing aggravated black eyes quite like bending down and causing a blood rush to the head.

"He's going to stay the night and make sure we're okay. There'll be patrol cops driving by all night at unpredictable times, too."

"Wow, a sliver of information at last. But come on, Nick, what's going on here? Why aren't they out looking for those guys?"

"He's doing everything he can. Let's just drop it, okay? I feel like shit and I need to go to bed."

"Drop it? How am I supposed to drop it, Nick? Those guys could come back anytime and you want to go to bed?"

"They're not coming back tonight, and even if they do, Ted will be here."

"Ted will—Jesus, Nick. Since when do we rely on Ted for our safety? I don't understand why we're not getting out of here right now."

"Well, I do. Look, Cody, I trust you, okay? If our places were reversed, I would trust you and you know it. Now I'm asking you to trust me."

"I—I want to. I really do," Cody said, sitting back on his heels. He ran his hands up the backs of Nick's legs, needing to maintain contact. "But you know what I saw when I came home tonight? I saw my best friend, the guy I love more than life itself, tied up and bleeding on the floor, and I don't know why. Would you let that go if our places were reversed?"

Nick took a deep breath and dug his hands into Cody's hair, drawing him closer. Cody rested his cheek against the denim covered knee and sighed. He wanted to be angry, wanted to yell and scream and break things, maybe beat on Nick until he got some answers. But he couldn't react to his lover's hurt by hurting him worse.

"Just stick with me, man," Nick whispered. "It'll make sense pretty soon. Just stay with me so I can protect you."

"I'm not going anywhere," he sighed. "Come on. Let's get you into bed." Cody got up and took off Nick's t-shirt, rolling it up his back, over his head and down his arms so he wouldn't have to stretch any sore muscles. Nick stood up to get out of his pants, then crawled into bed with a heavy sigh.

"Cody, you really want to help me, man?"

"Of course. Anything."

"Rub my back? I'll give you a nice reward."

"Yeah? What kind of reward?" he asked, undressing and straddling Nick on the bed.

"How about your choice?"

"That sounds promising," Cody laughed, reaching over him for the massage oil. He poured some and warmed it in his hand, his butt resting lightly on Nick's, feeling the tension of the waiting man beneath him. He leaned forward and began to knead the broad shoulders, working his thumbs into Nick's spine in a way that made his lover groan with need. "You like that, huh?"

"You know I do," Nick sighed. He was already getting hard and shifted on the bed to make room, wiggling his ass against Cody's strong thighs.

"How long do you want this to last?" Cody asked, working gently down his back. Nick winced when he hit a sore spot, and he paused to feel it out more thoroughly.

"About five more minutes. And then I want you inside me."

"Really? With Murray and the watch dog fifteen feet away?"

"So be quiet."

"You're the loud one," Cody said, digging into a tender spot on Nick's back and making him prove it.

"Oh, shit, man. Maybe three minutes will do."

"Whatever you say, buddy." He massaged slowly to the sound of Nick's moans, their bodies rocking together as if already joined, and when Cody began to prepare him with the lube it felt like a natural progression. He moved carefully, spreading Nick's legs with his knees, not breaking the rhythm of his hand. Nick tried to move, tried to help, and Cody stilled him with a hand on his shoulder. "Let me do this, Nick. You take care of me all the time. Let me take care of you this once."

"You always take care of me," Nick said, and then Cody was sliding into him. He groaned again, so loudly that Cody laughed. Nick got the joke and laughed with him, interspersing it with eager moans. Cody pinned him and drove deep, taking him to the edge of madness with tiny nudging thrusts against his gland. He stroked Nick's arm, hushing him when he got too loud, and biting Nick's shoulder to stifle himself. Nick writhed beneath him, his heart pounding, skin burning, wishing Cody would stop teasing and just fuck him already.

Suddenly, as if reading his mind, Cody rose up on his knees, lifting Nick just enough to reach beneath him and grip his leaking cock. Nick cried out and thrust into that welcoming hand, then braced his knees and slammed back against Cody's hips, shoving him deeper, harder, his cries dwindling to sobs of need. He tried to do it again and Cody bore him down, trapping his hand beneath their bodies so at least Nick had something good to rub against.

"Easy, babe," Cody whispered. "You'll hurt your back."

"Then give it to me. If you don't want me to try and take it, just give it to me."

Cody shifted his weight to his knees and elbow and complied. He set a fast, punishing rhythm, sliding his fingers over the head of Nick's cock as he pounded into him, forcing Nick to bury his face in his pillow to muffle his shouts as he came. It was that sound as much as the clenching muscle and burning heat that dragged Cody's orgasm from him, and he collapsed bonelessly across Nick's back, as if hurting him had never been a concern.

Soon they would get up. They would shower and dress and get back into bed, prepared to leap to their own defense should unknown forces attack them in the dark. Those things would happen very soon. But for now they lay together in the big bed, their bodies still joined, kissing and holding hands, knowing that if this was their last night together, they had done their best.

***

"Talk about rocking the boat," Quinlan said dryly, making Murray blush.

"Don't make fun, Ted. You know we'd do the same if it was one of us who almost—disappeared."

"Sure. I'm just jealous, that's all."

Murray put a cup of coffee on the table in front of his lover and sat down beside him. They were spending the night in the salon, their pistols on the bench beside them, the only light provided by a single lamp that was positioned carefully to show through the windows without lighting their silhouettes. There were lights on in Murray's cabin and in the anchor locker, where there was a porthole that would allow it to show. They wanted to give the appearance of the boat being well populated in case Nick's would-be abductors came back.

"We probably don't have time to sneak down below for a quickie, do we?" Murray asked in a tone that made it physically painful for Quinlan to say no.

"Better not. You always fall asleep and we got a long night ahead of us."

"_I_ always fall asleep?" he teased, leaning in for a kiss.

"Well, somebody does. Drink your coffee, kid."

Murray picked up his cup and sipped carefully, his forehead wrinkling in thought. Then he put it down, wiped his lips with his fingers, and turned to the lieutenant.

"Ted, those men who were here before…" He trailed off and sipped his coffee again.

"Yeah? What about 'em?"

"If this has something to do with Nick's guard duty, then doesn't it stand to reason that they're military, too?"

"Probably. What about it?"

"Well, how's that going to look if soldiers come here and we shoot them? I mean, shooting civilians is one thing, but military personnel? I don't know about you, but I've already come within an inch of Leavenworth and I don't really trust my luck to get me out of it again."

"It'll be okay. I doubt anybody's coming here tonight, and if they do, I'll take care of it. This thing is deep, but enough people know about it that they can't get rid of us all."

"I hope you're right." Murray laid his head on Quinlan's shoulder and sighed.

"I am. Give it a couple days and this'll all blow over. We'll be spending our nights at my place again, having a much better time staying up late."

"I always have a good time with you, Ted. It doesn't matter what we're doing. Of course, I do have a decided preference for things we can do with our clothes off."

"Me too."

They sat there all night long, taking turns pouring the coffee, and eventually dozing off with their heads together, still sitting upright, still on the job.

***

The next morning Nick took a long, hot shower, with Cody there to rub the kinks out of his stiff back and shoulders. There was hot coffee in the salon when they got there, Quinlan still sitting at the table with his eyes on the door, and Murray in the galley making breakfast.

"Were you up all night?" Cody asked, pouring coffee for Nick and himself.

"Most of it. I dozed off around dawn and I think Murray did, too. We didn't see anything, though, and if there'd been any noise, I'd have woken up."

"Thanks," Nick said. "Should I go help Murray with breakfast?"

"No," Cody said quickly. "Sit down and let me get some ice for your wrists."

"I'm fine," he protested, but sat anyway. He could smell bacon and the idea of grease popping on the welts left by the wire was discouraging.

"Get him the ice," Quinlan said, flat and authoritative. "And some for his eyes."

"You all won't be happy until I'm frozen."

"We'll switch you to heat later today," Cody soothed, and went below for the ice. He came back a few minutes later, his arms full of ice packs and his hands full of plates. Murray followed, carrying the food, and Ted helped him lay it out on the table.

"So, what are we doing today?" Murray asked, dishing up eggs and sausage for Nick.

"You were going to look up the last known addresses for Mary and Annie King so we could interview their neighbors," Cody reminded him.

"What? Oh, yes. But I don't mean that. I mean about Nick and these guys who are after him. You're going to be looking for them, right, Ted? How can we help?"

"We don't really have anything to go on with that," Quinlan said, filling his plate. "The best I can really do is keep watching here."

"That—that's it? You're not going to try and track them down? Ted, they—they were going to kill Nick. Doesn't that matter to you?"

"'Course it matters," he said shortly. "There's just nothing I can do." He didn't so much as look at Nick, who was also staring at his plate to avoid meeting Ted's eyes and giving anything away.

"Nothing you can do? So that's it? You're really not going to try?"

"Murray, stop," Nick said quietly. "If he can't find them, he can't find them. We're under guard now—that's enough."

"No it _isn't_," Murray insisted, hopping up from his seat. "I thought the police were supposed to solve crimes, _Lieutenant_. And I thought that Nick was your friend. Or that him being _my_ friend was worth something, at least. How can you just sit there and say you won't even try?"

Ted closed his eyes briefly, as if praying for strength. He didn't know what to say—he couldn't give away Nick's secret, or even reveal that he knew it—and there was nothing else that would satisfy Murray when he got like this. Nick cut in and saved him again. Almost.

"Murray, buddy, stop it. He's doing everything he can."

"No he _isn't_. And I don't know how you can be so calm about it, Nick. I know you don't expect as much from him as I do, but there's no excuse for any officer of the law to flat out refuse to look for—for kidnappers and killers. There must be some little detail you noticed that could break this thing wide open, but if he doesn't care enough to ask…" Murray trailed off under Quinlan's impassive blue stare. Their eyes locked for a long moment and then Murray turned away. He was down the stairs and gone before anyone could move, and the only sound on the boat was the sharp crack of his door slamming shut.

"I have the feeling I've missed a lot," Cody said finally, and the other two nodded. "But we're not talking about it?"

"I can't," Nick sighed. "You have to trust me."

"I do. But who does Murray trust?"

"If he starts poking around like he does, he could really fuck this up."

"And he will," Quinlan agreed. "If he doesn't think I'm doing anything, he'll do it himself."

"He'll get us all killed," Nick said flatly. "And I don't know how to tell him not to."

"Maybe I do." Ted got up and went after him, moving slowly, as if he already knew it wouldn't end well.

He knocked on the door and opened it when Murray told him to go away.

"Unless you're launching a massive investigation, I don't want to hear it," he said, not looking up from his computer screen.

"Baby, listen," Quinlan said. "It's not what you think, okay? I know some things about this case that you don't, and I really am doing the right thing."

"Does Nick know that?" he snapped, turning the full fury of his normally soft eyes on Ted at last.

"Yes, he does. I'm sorry I can't explain it all. I can't really explain any of it."

"Well you're going to have to. These are my best friends, Ted. This is my home, and we're not safe here. Don't you think I have a right to know why?"

"Yeah, you do. But I still can't tell you. And you can't go looking on your own, either. This thing is bigger than just Nick, bigger than all of us, and if you go attracting attention, it'll get a lot worse. I can protect you if you let me, but not if you start digging and making demands."

Murray hesitated at that, his fury wavering just a little, and then he recovered.

"That's not good enough."

"It has to be. There's nothing we can do right now, and if you try to pull any of your little hacking stunts, I'll have to arrest you."

"What?"

"It's illegal anyway, you know that. And if you try to fuck up this investigation, I'll have to put you away where you can't cause any trouble."

"So you're not going to do your job, and you'll lock me up if I try to do it for you. Is that it?"

"I _am_ doing my job. Just happens that, in this case, my job's not what you think it is. You've trusted me before, Murray, and I haven't let you down. Just trust me again."

"I trusted you with my life, Ted. It was mine to give. But this is Nick and Cody, and I can't give that much."

"They can. Murray—"

"_Fine_. If that's how it has to be, fine. I won't try to track down the people who are trying to _kill_ Nick, but only because I don't trust you to look after him while I'm in _jail_. I can't trust you if you won't trust me with the truth."

"Murray—"

"No. I know you know what's going on, and if you won't tell me, I don't see how I can trust you. It goes both ways, Ted. It always has. So you can stay here and be our guard dog if you want, but that's it."

"What's it? What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about _us_. Or _not_-us. Because we're over, Ted, as of now. I'm not going to waste my time, or my—my love, on someone who can't tell me why people are trying to kill my best friend. You go do your job, whatever the hell that is, and leave me alone."

"You don't know what you're doing, kid," he said quietly, urgently, his voice shaking.

"No, I do. I just don't know why, because you won't tell me. Now get out of my room. I have work to do."

"When all this is over, when you understand what happened, you'll regret this."

"Maybe. But you didn't give me a choice."

"Murray—"

"I don't want to hear it, Ted. Go tell it to Nick, or go to hell. Just get away from me."

"Fine. If that's what you want, fine. Just promise me you won't try to trace this back, for everyone's sake."

"Back to where? I don't have anything to go on, do I?"

"I sure hope not," Quinlan said and left the cabin, closing the door gently behind him. But his hands were trembling and he had to take a minute before he could climb the stairs.

Nick and Cody were still at the table, their eyes fixed on their plates, telling him plainly that they'd heard every word. He sat down and toyed with his eggs a little, but didn't eat any more.

"You know he'll get over it," Cody said suddenly.

"That's right," Nick agreed, nodding emphatically. "When this is all over, he'll apologize and everything will be fine."

"Maybe," Quinlan shrugged, as if it didn't matter all that much. As if it wasn't everything.

"No, he's right," Cody insisted. "He just—it isn't that he doesn't trust you. It's more that he's used to knowing more than everyone else and it scares him when he doesn't have all the facts."

"Yeah, whatever."

"Come on, it's not your first fight," Nick said. "You two have broken up and gotten back together more than any couple I know. He always comes around."

"Yeah, he does. But maybe he's wrong. If he really doesn't trust me, maybe we're both better off."

"Hey, not so fast…"

"Forget it, Nick. You got bigger things to worry about than my love life. I gotta take off, anyway. Check in at the station, get a report from last night's surveillance teams, all that shit. I'll be back this afternoon, though, and there'll be someone watching the boat all day. Don't go anywhere without checking with me."

Nick nodded, turning to Cody. "Give us a minute, will you?"

"Sure." He gathered up the dishes and went down to the galley. There was a rattle of plates and the sound of running water, then he was knocking on Murray's door.

"Are you going to get in touch with General Winchester?"

"I'm gonna try," Quinlan sighed. "They won't have my phone tapped like they probably have yours, but if he suspects that his is bugged, he won't tell me anything. I'll let you know how it went when I get back."

"Thanks. I really appreciate all of this, Ted. I'm just sorry it's costing you so much."

"Just doing my job."

"I mean with Murray. That's not part of your job."

"Hell, the job's how I got him," he said, rising and putting on his jacket. "But I always knew he was too good to be true."

"Hey, no—"

"Forget it. I'll be back soon. You three stick together, understand?"

"Affirmative," Nick sighed and watched him go with more regret than he'd ever felt over it before.

***

Cody understood Murray's feelings. He was sharing a good many of them. But he and Nick had been to war together and he'd learned to trust his partner with anything and everything. Murray had never had that kind of connection with anyone but him and Nick, and there too many poorly healed wounds in his relationship with Ted, the fragile scars ready to break open at any time. Like they did today.

"You know you're going to have to apologize to him, right?" Cody said to Murray's back as he stubbornly went on tracking down addresses.

"Apologize to whom?"

"Ted, you idiot. He loves you and he's just doing his job. You broke his heart just now, you know."

"No, I didn't know. Anyway, shouldn't you be taking care of Nick? He's the one who's hurt, not me."

"Really? Losing your first serious lover in—what—forever, doesn't hurt?"

"Cody, stop it."

"Stop what? You trust Nick, don't you? I'm sure he knows more than he's telling us, he maybe even knows who those guys were, and you're not yelling at him."

"Why aren't you?" Murray countered, spinning his chair around.

"Why aren't I what?"

"Yelling at Nick. If he knows and he's lying to you, to both of us, doesn't that make you angry?"

"No, not really. He must have his reasons, and they must be important. Think about it, Murray. Use that big brain of yours for something besides feeling sorry for yourself. How bad does this have to be for Nick to hide it from us? It has to be a government secret or something. You've kept those, right? You're probably still keeping some."

"I guess," he said reluctantly. "But he told Ted."

"That must mean that Ted can help him somehow. But apparently we still can't. And now that Ted knows, he has to join Nick in protecting you."

"That's not right, though. The two of them against us. That's not right at all."

Suddenly Cody understood and it was all he could do not to laugh.

"Is that it, buddy? Nick and Ted have a secret and you're not included? Oh, Murray."

He ducked his head, blushing furiously, and Cody knew he'd nailed it.

"You definitely owe him an apology, Boz."

"It's too late. I already ended it. I told him to go to hell."

"Well, you've done that before," Cody said, half smiling.

"I thought being in love was supposed to make things easier."

"It does, Murray. It makes everything easier, except the being in love part."

That time Murray laughed, mostly at himself.

"You should go look after Nick. He seemed—um—tired, at breakfast. Are his shoulders bothering him?"

"They're pretty sore. Those guys really yanked him around, I guess. I'll get him down to bed and sit up in the salon for a while. You ought to grab a nap, though. You're the one who was up all night."

_With Ted_, Murray thought sadly. _For maybe the last time. And I barely even touched him._ But what he said was, "I'll wait for Quinlan to get back. There should be at least two people on guard."

"Okay. I'll put some coffee on in the galley, in case you need help staying awake."

"Thanks, Cody." He kept smiling until he friend left, then turned back to the desk, put his head down on folded arms and shook violently for a long time. But he never made a sound, and when he sat up to return to work, his tired eyes were dry.

***

Cody talked Nick into bed again and rubbed his back until he fell asleep. Then he went up to the salon to wait. Quinlan didn't come back for hours, and when he did, it was apparent that he needed a nap as badly as anyone. Cody fired up his powers of persuasion once again and convinced him to sit and rest while he made sandwiches for lunch. Murray heard him in the galley and dragged himself out of his office to ask if he could help.

"Aren't you supposed to be sleeping?"

"After lunch. Is Ted here?"

"Yeah. You want to go say hi?"

"No. Make me a bologna and mayo?"

"Sure. But you're going to come up and eat with us."

"Whatever you want," Murray yawned and began to take plates down out of the cupboard.

Lunch was painfully awkward, Nick and Cody trying to force conversation while Murray ate determinedly and Quinlan struggled not to fall asleep. Everyone was wondering what kind of guard he was going to be in that condition, and Nick was a little bit scared. He knew he wasn't really injured, but he was hurting too much to fight effectively and he knew it. With Ted half asleep, that left Cody and Murray to protect them all, and Murray was tired, too. Thinking about the two big men who had knocked him down and held him while they bound his wrists, he knew that his friends wouldn't fare any better.

Seeing his worried expression, Cody tapped Nick's arm and asked, "You feeling okay? Do you want to go lie down?"

"Yeah, I suppose. Murray, would you come with me?"

"Sure. But wouldn't you rather have Cody?"

"I want to talk to you. Help me down the stairs, would you?" He rose and slung his arm around Murray's shoulders, leaning on him just exactly as much as he thought he could get away with. They went down to the aft cabin where Nick collapsed on the bed. Murray took his shoes off for him, got him an aspirin and waited to see what he'd say.

"I really appreciate you standing by me like this. You're a good friend, Boz, and I love you like a brother. You know that, right?"

"I know," he said, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. "I—I love you, too. And I'd never leave when you were in trouble. That's not even an option."

"I know that. I just want to make sure you know that I appreciate it. That kind of loyalty is rare. But I'm still not real happy with you right now."

"Really? What—why?"

"Because of what you're doing to Quinlan. He doesn't deserve this and I think you know it."

"Well, that's really my business, isn't it?"

"No, not really. It's because of me, so that makes it my business, too. Murray, he's doing his job. He knows a lot about what's going on, more than is safe for him to know, and he needs your support every bit as much as I do."

"Nick—"

"No, hear me out. He isn't doing anything wrong. He's doing what I asked, what I _need_, and I'm sorry he can't tell you about it, but that's just the way it is. You can't blame him for it."

"Can I blame you?"

"Yes, you can. If you need to blame someone, by all means, blame me. But I want you to think about this, okay? Think about how he's taken care of you, Murray. When you got shot, and when you almost died in that car wreck, he was the one there for you every minute. And when he had his gallbladder out, he would have died without you."

"I don't know about that."

"Well, I _do_. Ted told me himself that he never would have gone to the hospital if you hadn't been there. He was scared enough of the doctors to let himself die on that bathroom floor."

Murray was speechless for long moments. He hadn't told Nick the details, so if he knew about the bathroom, Ted had to have told him. And that made it true. It also meant they were closer than Murray had thought. It would take a while for him to decide if he liked that or not.

"So you think that means—what?"

"It means you need to think about it. You're scared right now, everyone's scared, and it's a bad time to be making decisions that'll affect the rest of your life. This guy loves you and you love him. Maybe it's not forever, I don't know, but don't throw him away over me. Everything else can be my fault, I don't care, but I don't want to carry this one."

"I don't want to give him up," Murray whispered.

"Then don't. Just think about it, man."

"Sure. Can I do anything else for you? Do you need some more water?"

"No, I'm okay. Go catch a nap, babe. We need you tonight."

"Okay. I'll be ready." Murray went up to the salon and found Ted there alone, lying down on the bench by the door. Flat on his back, ankles crossed, he looked distressingly the same as when he was preparing for Murray to ride him. Although Murray thought he'd have to be extremely horny to overlook the pistol stuck in Quinlan's belt. He didn't stop when Ted turned his head to look at him, but his steps slowed and his expression was all confusion. Ted's eyes were calm and appraising, apparently neither pleased nor displeased by what he saw. Murray set his face forward and went on down the stairs.

"Hey, Boz," Cody said as Murray stepped into the galley. "Nick okay?"

"He's in bed. I'll finish this if you want to go."

"No, I've got it. I slept last night, remember? You need to go to bed yourself."

"Sure, but if you're washing the dishes, I won't be able to sleep."

Cody looked torn for a second, as if choosing between cleaning and letting his friend rest was difficult, and then turned off the water.

"I'll finish this up later. But, Murray, what did Nick want to talk about? If it's not personal or anything."

"Um—it kind of is. I need to think about some stuff before I talk about it anymore."

"Okay. But I'm here when you're ready."

"I know, Cody. Thanks." He paused, his posture tentative, trembling with an unknown fear. Cody stepped closer and hugged him, feeling Murray's tension break, the slender body relaxing ever so slightly against his own. "I'm fucking it all up," he whispered. "Cody, I—I'm fucking up."

"No, you're not. It's a fucked up situation, babe, but you're doing great."

"Nick's lying to you and _you_ didn't dump _him_."

"You'll get there," Cody said gently. "Go to bed now. You had a long night."

Murray let him go and went to his cabin. He lay down without undressing and was asleep at once.

Cody waited ten minutes and then checked to make sure Murray was really sleeping. He would not have been surprised to find his friend working at his desk, but for once Murray had obeyed.

Up in the salon, Quinlan was still lying down, his arms crossed behind his head, staring at the ceiling.

"You okay, Ted?"

"Yeah, I'm great. I've got it covered up here if you want to go below for a while."

"I'm headed that way. Sure I can't get you anything?"

"I know where everything is. Murray go to bed?"

"Yeah, he's sleeping. Ted, you know he didn't mean those things he said before, right?"

"He meant it," Quinlan said, but he was smiling.

"Ted—"

"Doesn't mean he won't take it back, but he meant it. He ain't wrong, either. He's got a right to his feelings."

"That's big of you, Ted."

"Not really. It'll be bigger of him if he manages to apologize."

Cody laughed and asked, "Do you think he will?"

"He's always been the bigger man." Quinlan smiled strangely, an expression Cody had never seen, but with which he suspected Murray was very familiar.

"You're a weird guy, Ted."

"Not really," he said again. "He'll change his mind or he won't. It's always been about what he wanted."

"Then you're a good guy, too. But still weird." Cody flashed his reassuring smile and went on down to his cabin. Nick was waiting, barely awake, but needing to see him.

"Everything okay?" he mumbled, reaching for Cody's hand.

"Yeah, babe. Everything's fine."

***

That night was a repeat of the night before. Nick and Cody went to bed at dark, leaving Murray and Ted to watch the boat. They sat side by side in the light of the single lamp, drinking coffee and not talking, but the silence was only a little awkward. Like acquaintances who weren't sure if they'd be taking the next step to actual friendship, but didn't have anything in particular against each other.

Quinlan left before breakfast, claiming work, but also wanting to go home for a little while. The uniforms were still patrolling the pier, and everyone had agreed to stay on the boat until he got back, so the immediate danger was minimal. Still, Cody felt unreasonably exposed in the salon and tried to give Nick his breakfast in bed.

"I never thought I'd hear myself saying no to that," Nick said with a weary grin. "But I'm not an invalid and no one's coming after me."

"Not an invalid, huh? Is that why you're not up already?"

"Just because I want a little help, that doesn't make me ready for the rocking chair. Anyway, you could join me in the shower."

"I could. Anything below decks is fine by me."

He helped Nick out of bed and then out of his clothes, draped a robe around him and walked him to the head. Murray was cooking and the smell of frying ham filled the boat.

"You talk to Boz this morning?" Nick asked.

"Some. Why?"

"Has he made any progress with Ted?"

"Not that I could see. They'll be okay, though, Nick. You know that."

"I know. But I'll feel safer when Ted's got his whole mind on the case again."

Cody laughed. He was hanging their robes and turning on the water while Nick leaned against the wall.

"Buddy, his mind wasn't on the job when they were together, either. It was on Murray's ass and you know it."

"Sure, but it still is. Only he's gotta be thinking even more about how he might really never get it anymore."

"That's the worst," Cody said, running his hand over Nick's taut ass. "I know just the thought of not getting any of yours…"

"Yeah. Cody, man, that won't be us, will it? You're not going to break over this thing, are you?"

"No," he said harshly. "No, no way. Nick, I won't ever leave you."

"Good." The hot water relaxed him and he pulled Cody close, hugging him and backing him into the wall at the same time.

"Easy, babe. Don't strain yourself."

"No strain," Nick breathed, already growing hard. He pushed Cody's knees apart and stepped between them, rubbing firmly against him. His hands went to Cody's hips, holding him still so he could tease and touch with his cock, then leaned in again and took them both in hand. Cody wrapped his arms around Nick's shoulders and kissed him, moaning softly into his mouth.

It was quick and sloppy and probably the most relaxing thing they would do all week. They were just getting into their robes again when Murray knocked on the door to tell them breakfast was ready. Cody felt almost guilty being so happy and satisfied when Murray's heart was broken, but Nick felt no such dilemma. He wanted to enjoy being happy, and he knew Murray would be okay.

***

It was hot that afternoon. The heat was oppressive, sucking everyone's energy, and Cody had no trouble justifying hiding out below deck with Nick, a fan, and a pitcher of iced lemonade. Murray stayed in the salon, scribbling notes longhand in his binder and hoping his friends would be up before Quinlan came back. He hadn't really thought out all of the implications of breaking up with the lieutenant during a case. But then, if he had thought it all through, he never would have done it anyway. He was tired of being rash, of feeling stupid, of hoping to be forgiven for his latest act of complete selfish stupidity. In fact, if Ted didn't want to make up, that would simplify things a lot. He'd be alone forever, sure, but he'd never have to feel this bad again.

The pencil slipped from his sweaty fingers and he didn't bother picking it up. Instead, he got up and went down to the galley for a cold Mountain Dew. Just the sound of the pop top when it cracked open made him thirstier and he drank half of it at once. Two deep breaths and the other half went down, cold and smooth. Murray thought for just a second and then opened another. He was drinking this one slowly, savoring it, when he heard the sound of feet on deck. At first he thought it was Ted, but there was definitely more than one person. His first instinct was to run up there and scare away whoever it was, but Murray wasn't very scary, and he knew it. Instead, he slipped back into his cabin and dialed Ted's home number from memory, hoping desperately that he was there.

"Quinlan," said the harsh, tired voice he was counting on.

"Ted, it's Murray," he whispered. "They're here."

"Shit. Stay on the boat. I'm on my way."

That made sense to him. They had to be where Ted could find them, and they had to be together. More than that, Murray had to tell his friends that help was coming. He gripped his pistol firmly and ran back up the stairs.

Two men were disappearing down the aft stairs and one turned around at the sound of his approach. He fired a silenced pistol and Murray hit the floor just ahead of the shot, trying to level his own weapon. Then Nick and Cody were there and all hell broke loose. Two more shots were fired before Cody got the intruders' guns away and it degenerated into a fistfight. People were shouting, Nick was bleeding, and Murray's greatest contribution to the battle ended up being finding the roll of wire that had been used on Nick so that Cody could use it on the intruders. While Cody did that, Murray got a towel and tended to Nick, trying to stop the bleeding from what looked like a nasty shoulder wound.

"Is it bad?" Cody asked, not looking up from the man he was binding.

"I'm not sure. Nick, are you okay?"

"Am I shot, Murray?"

"Yes, but just in the shoulder. Does it hurt very much?"

"I can't tell. Cody? Cody, are you there?"

"I'm here, buddy. Hang on a second. I'm going to call for help."

"I did that already," Murray said quickly. "Before I came upstairs."

"Thank God. Change places with me, Boz." He handed Murray the nearest pistol, which happened to be Murray's own, and took over holding the towel to Nick's wound.

"Cody?"

"It's me, Nick. I'm right here. We've got these guys and I'm right here."

"Cody?"

"I'm here, Nick. Just hang on."

"Cody…"

They heard sirens up on the street at the same time Quinlan burst through the door, looking for someone to shoot.

"Holy fuck. Ryder, are you alive?"

"Cody?" Nick groaned in response. Either he thought everyone was Cody, or he wanted everyone to be. It was all the same to Ted.

"There's an ambulance on the way. Are these the same guys as before? Did Ryder ID them?"

"No," Murray said. "We're just assuming."

"Safe bet. You okay, kid? Looks like you're bleeding."

Murray touched the corner of his mouth, which seemed to hurt all of a sudden, and his fingers came away bloody.

"I—yeah. I guess someone hit me. I didn't notice."

Cody was bleeding from a broken nose, but when Ted shot him a questioning glance, he shook his head. He felt fine, aside from his worry over Nick. Ted nodded back and went to the two men who were lying face down on the floor, their hands wired behind them as they had once done to Nick. He used his one pair of handcuffs to cuff them together and then took Murray's gun.

"Fewer civilians we have armed, the better," he said. Murray agreed. He didn't want to be pointing a gun at people when the rest of the police officers arrived, which they did fairly quickly. The intruders refused to talk and were taken away. Nick was loaded onto a gurney and carried off the boat with Cody following close behind, while Murray gave his statement at the scene like the good little witness he was.

After he'd gone through it for the uniforms, the lieutenant, and the captain, everyone was herded off the boat so the crime scene techs could work. Murray knew he was useless, that the little he'd said couldn't possibly help because he'd only told half of what he knew, and he knew very little. All he really wanted was to get over to the hospital and bite his nails while he waited for word about Nick. Well, he wanted that and a sweater. It had been hot before, the air aboard the _Riptide_ stifling, but now he was cold. Shivering, even, his teeth wanting to chatter in spite of the sun.

Quinlan saw it and grasped him by the arm.

"Captain Fox, I want to take Dr. Bozinsky over to the hospital. Let him check on his friend, and maybe have the doctor take a look at him."

The captain gave Murray a cursory glance, took in his pallid face and trembling hands, and nodded shortly.

"Maintain radio contact, Lieutenant," was all he said.

"Yes, sir." He turned Murray around and walked him briskly up the gangway, keeping him moving so he didn't have time to think about it and get even more upset. When they got to the car, Quinlan opened the front door and pushed Murray gently inside, still not giving him a chance to protest.

"You okay, kid?"

"I'm cold."

"Okay, hang on." There was a blanket in the trunk, a blanket they had once cuddled under on the hood of the car while watching the stars come out, and he wrapped it around Murray's shoulders now. "Is that better?"

"Yes, thank you," he said vaguely, snuggling more into it. Ted closed the door and went around to the other side. He got behind the wheel and Murray looked at him, frightened, suspicious, and most of all, cold.

"Nick's okay, you know. It's not a bad wound and he'll be under guard at the hospital."

"I fucked it all up," Murray said, turning to the window. Ted started the car and pulled away from the curb before answering.

"You did the right thing. Calling me before anyone got hurt—that was great."

"If I hadn't fucked it up, you'd have already been there."

"None of this is your fault, Murray. Nick—he didn't do anything wrong, but he brought this on you. You're just doing the best you can."

"It's my fault you weren't there to protect him."

"No, it isn't. I was at the station doing paperwork. I'd've been doing that no matter what."

"Really?"

"Really. And this isn't the time to talk about it, anyway."

"Do you hate me, Ted?"

"No. And we're not talking about it."

"Okay," Murray said, still shivering in his blanket. "So, does this mean it's over?"

"Is what over?"

"The case. Is Nick out of trouble now?"

"Probably not. Those guys are hired guns, that's all. The guys who hired them will just send more."

"So what do we do?"

"We'll figure it out. We'll put guards at the hospital for Nick, and Cody will probably stay with him. I'll stay with you, or get you someone else, if that's what you want."

Murray nodded, clenching his jaw to keep his teeth from chattering. Then suddenly it was for something else.

"Ted, pull over," he said desperately, barely able to get the words out through his teeth.

"What's wrong?"

"Pull over. I'm going to be sick."

Quinlan whipped the unmarked cruiser over to the side of the road and slammed on the brakes. Murray flung the door open and leaned out just in time. But even as he lost his lunch, he felt the warmth Ted's arms around him, holding him so he didn't tumble out into the dirt. For a long moment he just hung there, clinging to the door post and letting Ted hold him, trying to get his breathing under control. Then Ted was pulling him back in, handing him a wad of napkins and watching closely to see that he didn't puke again.

"You got it now?"

"Yes, I think so. I'm sorry, Lieutenant. I didn't mean to—to…"

"Forget it. People get sick, it's okay. Especially after they see their best friend get shot. Are you okay now?"

"Yeah, I'm—I'm fine. We should go," he mumbled, closing the door and wrapping the blanket more tightly around himself.

Quinlan nodded and eased back into traffic. He watched Murray from the corner of his eye, clearing his throat and spitting into the wad of napkins before finally stuffing them in the trash bag. He badly wanted to ask Murray if he was sure he was all right, and two days ago he would have, but now it seemed too likely he would be snapped at and he wasn't in the mood.

They drove the rest of the way in silence, Ted focusing on the road, and Murray shivering in his blanket.

***

At the hospital, Murray abandoned his blanket and followed Ted inside. He went to the restroom first to rinse his mouth and wash his face, taking a few minutes to breathe and make sure he had himself under control. Ted waited outside the door, unobtrusive but needing to know he was all right. Murray looked surprised to see him when he came out, and that surprise hurt Ted more than anything that had been said so far.

"Did you ask about Nick?"

"Thought you'd want to do that." He turned toward the reception area and Murray went along. He hated to admit it, but he thought he could use the support.

***

Cody was in the exam room with Nick, holding his hand and keeping him calm while the doctor looked at his wound.

"Is it bad?" Cody asked, feeling stupid even as he heard the words. It was a gunshot wound. Of course it was bad.

"It's a gunshot wound," Nick said dryly. "Of course it's bad."

"He's not wrong," the doctor said. "But it's not too bad. We'll have to do a little exploratory surgery, but he looks good so far."

"So he'll be okay?"

"Probably. Any allergies, Mr. Ryder?"

"No. I could use some more drugs, though. Can you give me something for the pain?"

"In just a minute." He turned to the nurse and told her to call up for an OR, and then get another unit of blood and some morphine. Cody held Nick's hand while all those things went on around them and Nick did his best to only feel that.

***

"Here," Quinlan said, handing Murray a can of Sprite as he sat down beside him in the deserted waiting room.

"What's this for?"

"It's for drinking. You'll feel a lot better."

Murray tapped the top of the can with his fingernail before opening it. He always did that and he didn't know why, just that everyone in his family did, too. He also didn't know why drinking the Sprite made him feel better, or why Ted had gotten it for him. After pondering it awhile, he asked.

"Why are you suddenly taking care of me again?"

"What do you mean _again_? I never stopped."

"I don't deserve it, Ted. I broke up with you. You shouldn't be taking care of me."

"Did you really mean it? Do you really not want to be with me anymore?"

"I—I thought I meant it," he said slowly. "I was angry, but—but I thought…"

"You really think you can't trust me?" Quinlan asked, pinning Murray's soul to the wall with his sharp blue eyes.

"No, I don't think that," he confessed in shame. "Not really. Ted…"

"Don't. I hate it when you're humble." He laid his hand on Murray's back and absently massaged the tight muscle below his right shoulder blade.

"Do you think you'll ever stop taking me back?"

"Only if you ever mean it."

"I love you, Ted. You know that, right?"

"I know."

"Is that why you kept taking care of me? You knew I'd change my mind?"

"Aw, hell. I wasn't going to stop after all this time, just because you were having a shit day. Anyway, it's still part of my job. Even if you don't want _us_ anymore, I'll still look after you until this is over."

"Because it's your job?"

"Because I love you, nitwit."

"And it's your job."

"And it's my job."

Murray laughed, releasing a little of the tension that was making his spine ache, and Ted began massaging alongside it, careful not to press on the prominent bones.

"I'm sorry I'm making this so hard for you, Ted. I'm sorry that I can't be—consistent."

"I don't know what that means."

"It means I'm a terrible partner. How many times have I tried to break it off for no good reason? I keep getting scared and hurting you and you keep forgiving me. I'm glad and everything, don't get me wrong. I'm just sorry that I make things so hard."

"That's the price I pay for being with a genius. Everyone knows you people are overemotional. And I know all I have to do is ride it out and you'll come around."

"You're telling me you don't mind?"

"I'm telling you I got free time. It ain't like there's a string of men waiting to fight over me the minute you're out of the picture."

"You're being stoic again."

"I'm being stoic. It's what I do," he said, sliding his hand up Murray's back to rub the base of his neck. "I won't lie to you, kid, it scares the shit out of me every time you take off. If you didn't come back, I don't think I'd even try again. That's not meant to make you feel guilty or anything, it's just the truth. You're my last relationship, however long it lasts."

"But no pressure, right?"

"Right. Look, if you need some time, if you want to be separated for a while, work some stuff out…"

"No," Murray said quickly. "No, I just—I was upset. It's all worked out."

"For now."

"It's always for now. Things happen, I get upset. But I—I'll always love you. Even when I'm fucked in the head."

"Yeah, I know that." He squeezed Murray's neck gently, then let his hand fall away as Cody walked in.

"How's Nick?" Murray asked, jumping to his feet.

"He's, uh, going into surgery. But he'll be okay. He was—he was talking to me until the last minute. He'll be okay." Cody sat down next to Murray, who unselfconsciously put an arm around him and hugged him close. It was just enough to keep Cody together, and Murray held him for a long time.

***

Nick stayed in the hospital under guard for three days and Cody stayed with him. It was partly for Nick's peace of mind, and partly to protect them both with the fewest number of cops. Murray stayed at Ted's house and kept out of sight, while a variety of friends kept up traffic on and off the boat, in unpredictable patterns. No one asked any more questions and only Ted knew what was happening with the case. Nick might have tried to find out had he not been in so much pain, but for a change he was happy just to rest and be cared for while someone else handled the hard parts.

When he was able to leave, Cody got them a room at _Straightaway's_, where there were fewer entry points and it was easier to guard. Ted moved onto the boat with Murray and told people that Nick wasn't ready to come back after the attack, but that he would be soon. The shooters had spilled their guts when threatened with serious federal time, and the military was moving quickly to round up everyone involved in the Stinger thefts.

On the day that Colonel Thompson was arrested, Nick and Cody went home to the _Riptide_. Cody and Murray still didn't know what was happening, or even why they were allowed to go home now, but Cody had faith, and Murray was learning. It helped a lot that Ted stayed with them, both comforting Murray and confusing the issue of whether the problem was solved or not. If the object of the game was to keep people completely in the dark, Ted was guaranteed to win.

They had pizza that night and Nick went to bed early. He was generous enough to let Cody undress him and fuss over him a little, enduring it with more than his customary patience. Nick was feeling better than he had in a long time. His earlier injuries were healed and the painkillers he was taking had dulled the gunshot wound sufficiently that he was able to enjoy Cody's hands on his body. Lying in their bed, he sighed happily as Cody petted him, the two of them stretched out together, sharing their pleasure and leaving their pain behind. At least for now.

Cody propped himself up on one elbow to better lean in for a kiss, his right hand sliding down Nick's body and gripping his half-hard cock. It leapt to rigid attention as Nick groaned, his voice bringing Cody fully erect in return.

"Oh, there's my boy," Nick laughed, reaching for him, making him moan. "I've missed you, man."

"I've been right here," he whispered and captured Nick's mouth in a hungry kiss. They moved together, squeezing and stroking, biting lips and sucking tongues, making no effort to keep their voices down. Nick came first, his whole body locked in a spasm that jerked Cody's orgasm from him. They collapsed together, Cody remembering to fall to the side, but never breaking contact.

Up in the salon, Quinlan turned to Murray with an evil grin, which wasn't all that different from his regular grin.

"Is this a normal day in the life around here?"

"No, they're usually louder," Murray said, turning off the TV. "Are you staying up here tonight?"

"That's up to you."

"It is?"

"Well, I ain't going to ask to sleep with you, but I'd be stupid to refuse."

"You won't ask? Why not?" Murray teased, blushing faintly. "We slept together at your place."

That was literally true. They had shared a bed, but all they'd done was sleep. Murray was too worried about his friends, and Ted was afraid to push him and risk breaking their fragile reparation. He knew Murray loved him, that they were bound together, but this was a very bad time to test the strength of that bond.

"There wasn't anywhere else _to_ sleep at my place. Not like these incredibly comfortable benches you have here."

"Come with me, Ted. My cot's at least as nice as the benches. Although it's probably a little warm in this weather, with me and the computers and everything."

"I like being warm."

Murray blushed a darker red but took his hand, and they went below decks together. For the first time since they broke up, Murray offered himself to the man he loved, and the offer was accepted. Ted was gentle, covering Murray's mouth with his hand as he entered his body, eliciting eager cries and muffling them at that same time. It was all he could do not to thrust hard, not to take everything his willing lover had to give, but he managed to hold back, wanting to make it last. Murray writhed and bucked beneath him, wanting more but unable to ask for it with Ted's hand over his mouth. He begged with his body instead, flexing and clenching, biting at the restraining hand.

A sharp, keening wail built in his throat as he fought for more depth and more force. Ted eased back, just barely grazing his tender gland, and Murray rose up to follow, shoving him in deep and hard. Their lovemaking almost always turned out this way, with Murray's lust overcoming Ted's good intentions, and Ted let go of his mouth to grip his hand instead.

"Oh, yes," Murray purred, setting a punishing rhythm that his lover couldn't resist. It was inevitable that Ted's free hand would slide beneath him to stroke and fondle, and when Murray got close enough to come, he made sure to take the lieutenant with him.

Ted shot deep inside him, panting and cursing, pounding hard as Murray writhed and sobbed, both of them overwhelmed. It had been so long, and the finale so good, Ted stayed hard longer than usual, buried in the heat of Murray's body, holding his hand and feeling his lingering shudders.

"Okay, baby?"

"Yeah," he sighed, lifting his hips a fraction so that the head of Ted's cock slid across his gland again. Both of them gasped in mixed pleasure and pain, savoring it for just a few seconds before Ted withdrew and lay down beside him.

"I gotta admit, I was a little bit worried we'd never do that again."

Murray gave him a handful of tissues, smiling sweetly in the near-darkness.

"You really thought you couldn't get me back if you wanted to?"

"I knew I couldn't. Chasing you is like chasing a dog. If I go after you, you just run faster. I gotta wait for you to get tired and come home on your own."

"Flattering. So why do you do it? Why do you always wait and take me back?"

There was a brief silence, during which he seriously doubted the wisdom of the question, and then Ted answered.

"I love you, Murray," he whispered, blushing. Not at the sentiment, but at the memory of all the mornings he had woken from dreams both good and bad with those words on his lips.

"I love you, too," Murray said, curling up comfortably against him.

"So that's it? You're not gonna ask me about Nick anymore?"

"Nope. He's home and you're sleeping in my bed, so it must be okay. But I'll find out someday, right?"

"Yeah, someday."

"All right, then. Goodnight, Ted."

"'Night, baby."

***

Nick finally told them the whole story the day before they would have heard it in court. It meant keeping the secret for months, but Cody was okay with that and Murray gradually learned to be. It ended with Colonel Thompson and his cohorts going to Leavenworth, and Nick's friends feeling rather relieved that they hadn't had to carry the burden of knowledge all that time. Murray had to live with the shame of not trusting his lover, but Quinlan never held it over him. Cody had no such problem, having never lost faith at all.


End file.
